My other fellow ushers and I were going about our own business cleaning the theater that had just finished a showing of the highly anticipated, and from what I've heard, very lackluster, Cars 2. This lady was still in the theater frantically looking for something. I continued sweeping up the garbage and spilled popcorn all over the floor by a bunch of little bastards while the other two ushers went to assist the crazed lady. It turns out she was looking for her daughter's doll's glasses. Not real glasses that belonged to one of them, but the doll's glasses and having a cow over it.
I have no idea if the doll's glasses were found, I can only hope she has contacts at home. Anyways, while searching, Dylan, the crazed lady's son decides this is a good time to run away. So the little bastard runs out of the theater into the lobby. So lady, daughter, and doll pursue. My coworkers and I don't think much of this because the lobby at our theater is not very large so it won't be that hard to find delinquent Dylan. However, when we are exiting the theater, this fat cow just outside the door looks at us and asks us if there is a little child in the theater.
We politely tell her that there is no one else in the theater. She proceeds to tell us that a mother is looking for her child, as if we can't hear her cries coming from the back of the lobby: DYLANNNNN!!!!!!!! I don't know why the crazy lady/mother was looking for her son out the emergency exits door, as I highly doubt the child could even open those doors. Apparently the fat cow thought we were unconcerned and instantly went to bitch mode: "You guys could at least pretend you care. That mother is looking for her child," said in an annoyingly condescending tone. I was thinking about how SHE could help out, too, instead of sitting her fat cow ass right there and bitching at us. So we split up and headed in different directions in the theater to look for the little fuck. I think about thirty seconds later Dylan ran over to his mother. Who knew the kid had been running around the theater! I thought we was half way to Timbuktu!
I found out the next day that the Dylan had apparently ran into the bathroom and went up to some guy who brought him out to his crazed mother. I sure hope that this event didn't distract them from finding the doll's glasses. We should also look at the silver lining in situations such as these. There are always important lessons to learn. In this case, perhaps Dylan is bi-curious.
No comments:
Post a Comment