Roommates: The Last Words

I've been a huge slacker on the blogging front lately, but now finals are over and I have no class to go to or job to show up for, so that creates time for blogging! This is going to be an interesting time in my life because undergraduate school and collegiate track are both over for me. I still have the actual graduation ceremony to go to this Saturday, which happens to be the same day as the Champions League final unfortunately, but it is strange to think college is done. I have to say I feel much the same way I did in high school, there were some fun times, but I'm ready to get the hell out of there and go do something different. I'm really hoping that finding a job won't be a huge pain in the ass, but if it is, I'm sure I'll at least get some good stories out of it. Looking back at the past four years I've spent in college I can see how my life has changed and how the people who are important to me have changed. For the most part I still stay in touch with my close friends from high school, which I am very pleased about, but the vast majority of people I knew then I rarely communicate with now. That might sound depressing, but it's not, because there are many new people that have worked their way into the closer circle of friends.

While I don't have 1,983,435 friends, the ones I have kept in touch with and the ones I have developed at school are relatively strong friendships, especially with a small group people (from high school and college) that I consider my best friends whom I will probably have communication with for the rest of life. What I'm not going to miss is tests, crappy group projects, and excessive alcohol/drug use. This brings me back to my roommates. I have been preparing for quite some time the last installment of the stupid shit that my roommates say, which can be found a little further down on this post. This installment is rather long, but it's the last one and I am so happy that I won't be subject to this stupid conversation any longer. I guess I do have to go back for one night before graduation, but it's basically over, thankfully.

In efforts to ignore the dumb conversations, I frequently listen to comedians.  Recently I've been listening to a larger variety of comedians including Luis CK. Louis is a funny guy, but one of his jokes summed up my roommates very accurately which made it particularly funny to me. Below is the joke, listen to it and you will understand my roommates better.



Annnnd here they are, the last contributions to the mini-series:

Actually I just jacked off... so I just gave up.

I'm pretty sure I'm gonna f**k her.

It was just me and three freshman girls just rollin' up joints. It doesn't matter who's on campus.

Definitely shouldn't trust me.

Yo, I'm not pissed, but did one of you house my Butterfingers?

I might have messed this up if this girl thinks I'm lookin' at porn all the time. Which I might ... but this is not good.

It's gonna be so funny when I bang her and stop hittin' her up.

I hooked up with her once and now she won't talk to me.

I've made out with a girl 'til 5 or 6 in the morning. I just try to keep takin' her panties off. She kept sayin' no, but it only takes one yes.

My plan for tonight is to wait 'til like 10 and pound SoCo... and just get belligerently drunk.

Man, I skipped like mad classes this week. I wasn't even tryna skip.

What's that saying again? Beer before liquor get drunk quicker?

Honestly, she was talkin' like she just wanted to get dicked up

Dude, what do you think of these two girls? It's not usually my style, but look at that black girl's ass. It's actually kinda gross.

I have to keep my reputation as a douche bag.

That chick **** had no intentions of hookin' up with me. What a waste of time.

She won't sleep with me because I banged her f**ckin' roommate.

You wanna see this cannon we're about to smoke?

So pretty much, I'm gonna lose 20% of my grade.

I could call up that freshman chick ***. I don't think she likes me at all.

Does nap equal sex?

The plan was to let her smoke as much weed as she wanted... and that's it.

I've been real paranoid the last couple days. I was sittin' here on Saturday and a car pulled up to the fire lane and took a picture of the house.

I hate multiple choice because I can usually bullshit on a normal test.

Yo, you think I'm gonna be dirty now that I have golf shoes? (hooray for a different subject!)

I'm not smokin' 'til 4/20 so I can get super high.

Good luck not smokin'.

I think I'm done. I just don't feel like being this paranoid all the time.

Dude, I'm broke, I have no money. And my parents don't just give me money. (maybe I'll explain why this is funny, or you can just wonder)

My goal is to make it to last call at Rente's. I want to pick up some drunk sluts.

This girl, ****, wants me so bad. At first she wasn't texting me at all, but now she is all the time.

I am his mom. I'm Wiz's mom and dad.

Just don't do what I did, spend all your money and smoke a ton of weed.

Yo, Mike, where do you think would be a good place to find some sluts? ..... No, those are whores. I want sluts.

Dude, **** was givin' me some dirty looks in class today.

Her vagina is gross, too, it has some real disgusting parts.

I saw ****'s ex-boyfriend today and I'm even more perplexed. I don't understand why she won't f**k me.

I got a movie quote for you: "knock knock. Who's there? Go f**k yourself."

**** ruined my nest egg. She smoked my retirement fund.

Do you think that girls really have guy friends? Because she texts me like every day. Maybe I just come from a different class of guys.

Dude, be careful because I have a feelin' DPS is pullin' a raid on me on 4/20. If they raid me, it will be at like 5 in the morning, so we can smoke all day.

This girl is the biggest cockblock of all time. I think she's part clueless and part c**t.

What she said to me was I'm too nice. What I said to that: "wow, don't get that too often."

It really sucks, dude, cus you're gettin' pussy. So you can just wait it out. I'm not, so I'm just wasting time. It's just that... every time she texts me, I think I'm in.

You think you hooked up with a girl when she had a boyfriend? Yeah buddy!

Dude, India has nuclear bombs? Awww shit.

Those guys in the Middle East would, they're retards.

Damn, look at these f**kin' hot sluts.

No, I just wanna bang her. (answering the question "do you like her?")

I'm gonna shower and get ready for the day. Hit me up later. (at 6:57 PM)

You stayin' here tonight, ***? (Yeah.) We gotta find some sluts, dude.

I'm honest with girls. I don't want a relationship. Don't want 'em, don't like 'em.

I'll be out of the friend zone when I put it in her. I can tell she wants dick.

I don't smoke cigs. I only smoke cigs when I'm drunk.

I'm not a stoner.

My dick is sore from dry humping.

I got half a boner, I just woke up, and you're like "let's go to the gym, let's go to the gym."

If it doesn't go down tonight my balls are gonna be bluer than that solo cup.

I saw her come over here with that beer in her hand and I was like oh yes. Yes, yes, yes.

I was spitting some ferocious game that night.

I actually am gonna bust in like 2 minutes because I'm so built up.

I'm not gonna be real good at sex right now, but that's your fault.

How fast you bust depends on how into the girl you are.

This girl is gonna be devastated after I f**k her and I don't call her back. I don't give a f**k, there are only two weeks of school left.

I'm just tryna go to bed... and smash ... and not hang out.

I'm in my prime. I'm bangin' sluts all the time. Make-outs are in the hundreds.

Dude, it is so expensive to f**k.

You still tryna do coke tonight?

That's actually why I go to the library, to see if there are any girls I know. Hey, how you doin'? Can I sit here?

Yo, what's up baby? Can you suck my c**k tonight, please?

I'm gonna go all out. I'm gonna smoke up this girl **** on like 1,000 blunts and just f**k her. I gotta start goin' to the gym.

She looked really f**ked up. That's good right? I heard sex on vikenin is the best.

Check out this new cut I gave my pubes. It's stylin'.

Like last night I was pretending to study, but I was thinking I really want to f**k this girl.

It's gonna suck getting written up as an alumni.

That's what my dick was like when I was f**kin' that chick, not hard, but not soft.

Bozo's Sidekick

Yeah, *** still won't f**k me. I would do whatever I have to.

I don't know how I got so drunk last night.

My bad tryna fight that kid, I don't know what I was thinkin'.

I couldn't get the job done last night. Hopefully bang her next time.

Dude, I'm doin' so bad in school right now. I just got a 68 on my paper.

I thought when girls were on the rebound they just wanted ...

She fell asleep in the bed in her clothes, so I asked her to leave. (Did you bang her?) No, that's why I asked her to leave.

I skipped class, but I had a chance for some morning sex.

It's kind of funny to think about how much it costs to bang out chicks.

Doesn't it suck that it's harder to get a girl to f**k you if they actually like you?

I would also like to point out that roommate number two, Bozo's sidekick, or whatever you want to refer to him as, had a falling out with the person he was going to go to senior ball with. The falling out was because she wouldn't have sex with him. Last I knew he was just not going to go, but who knows what has happened since then. What a guy! To say the least, I am very glad to know that my time living in that house is coming to an end.

What's up next I don't entirely know. My family and I are going (we went out, I just haven't blogged in so long that I wrote this portion before we left) out to Washington (the state) to visit my sister who has been living out there for a little over a year now. Then I guess I'll be looking for a job. I'm excited to see what transpires, this is the time of life when you really start becoming independent. I think ideally I would get a job and live at home for a little while, if possible, to save money. I would like to get a job in the city and eventually get an apartment or something with some friends, that would be the ideal situation. Which city, I do not know, but I think the most important thing is to just get a job at this point.

Enough of this gay banter, though, there are more interesting things to contemplate. Actually, maybe there isn't. All I do know is that I don't have a job, this means that I have no income right now (thankfully I have actually managed to save some money over the years!) and my days are wide open. I can do whatever I want practically whenever I want. Yes, that does include looking for a job, though. Now that I think of it, my entire life is wide open right now. I don't have a job, so that means I have the freedom to apply to jobs wherever because I don't have any reason to stay here or go to any particular place. The other thing is that I have no girlfriend either. I have (or had, I'm not sure what tense to put this sentence in) a good thing going with a girl at school, but due to some circumstances (good circumstances if you care) I haven't been able to see her much and that's not going to change for a while at least, and possible forever. I might get into this topic some more given all the free time I'm going to have. So if you're at all interested be sure to check back. So at this point I have no idea what's going to happen in my life, but I plan on making it a fun ride!

The coolest Chinese Man ever!

Since I cannot go to sleep, which is why I decided to finish this at 2 in the morning despite the draft sitting in the post list for probably almost two months now (meaning why the hell haven't I finished this yet!), I'm probably going to start an article for Penultimate Round Pick on the man pictured above, Liu Xiang!

More Crap My Roommate Says

Here it is, the second installment of the things that come out of my roommates mouth! Another classic assortment of phrases. This list has been building up since the first post documenting his dialogue, about two months of material is in here. But you must remember, this is only a sample of what I have heard. I'm sure I've missed some gems, but this is still an entertaining collection. I really wish I had this idea way earlier. This could have been a great series, but I was too stupid to recognize the potential until about three months ago. Sometimes hearing this shit is funny, but sometimes it's the most annoying stuff in the world. I actually have very few conversations with two out of the three other guys I live with because I don't think anyone can have a normal conversation with the two of them. All they ever talk about is sex, drugs, and alcohol, which is technically a drug, so they really only talk about two things, two things I'm not very interested in discussing, at least with them. Their conversations lack any substance whatsoever, but it could just be that I'm strange.

When I come to think about it, there are actually a lot of days when I don't have much interaction with any of the people I live with. I'll have very brief conversations, but that's about it. I don't have the same connection with them as I do with many of my other friends. As I believe I mentioned at some point, all the people I enjoyed hanging out with at school, for the most part, graduated. But that's not the point of this post, the focus is the habits of my roommates. The roommate I'm deriving all these quotes from, code name Bozo, is the classic player. He likes to drink and have sex. I think there is more emphasis on the sex part, but drinking often goes along with that for so many different reasons. My other roommate, who I briefly referenced in the first installment, Things My Roommates Say, is kind of like his partner. He was that guy freshman year who wanted to try everything. This led him down an interesting path and he is now like Bozo, but with a very different personality. Basically the two of them want to have lots of sex. On Thursdays they often go to a local bar that is filled with people who go to the same school as us. The goal: interact with drunk girls and hope to score.

My other roommate I shared a room with sophomore and junior year, but now we each have singles. Actually, all four of us have singles now that one of our roommates moved out after the fall semester. He's the only one I ever have interesting conversations with. However, I don't really do anything with any of the people I live with. I think it sucks because I used to have fun sophomore year when I was living with people who had similar interests as me. We went to Monster Jam that year! The three of them always do thing together. Only my actual former roommate, the legend (inside joke alert), ever invites me along. Most of the time I decline because I'm not interested. They're always ordering out for food, which I sometimes take part in, but often they're picking up (if you don't know what I mean, then don't worry about it), or going out to get drunk and find girls to have sex with.

But without further rambling on about the people I live with, here are some of the things I've heard Bozo say over roughly the past two months:

Dude, I just found out I have two midterms tomorrow.

Wizzy boy, I love you so much. You're so good.

Buddy, you are getting played right now. I'm laying the pipe on your girlfriend right now.

We're thinking about hitting up Match.com to find some sluts.

I just wanna bring mad bitches back. That's my goal.

My career is gonna be f**kin' bitches. For the first couple of years. I'm gonna be the kid hittin' on all my coworkers.

Dude, I'm not gonna f**k bitches at my parents' house.

I would sleep 'til about two. Smoke some pot. Then go party. That's a stupid f**kin' question. I wouldn't work. I wouldn't do anything that constitutes a salary.

Dude, he's like f**kin' possessed. Look at him.

I wish there was a way to know if you're gonna get drug tested.

How the f**k am I supposed to trust you when you f**ked me when you had a boyfriend.

That girl who likes Anthony is sooo hot. (he will never get this)



When you see my f**kin' tan tomorrow, you are gonna be so jealous.

I've never been this addicted to being tan.

I'm gonna go another two hours tomorrow, just bronze. It's not as gay as going to a tanning booth.

She left a huge wet spot on my bed. It looked like a cum spot the size of a Frisbee.

I'm going to get a DUI. I'm gonna start a DUI fund.

I saw Alex today, walking into the gym with his f**kin' suit on. I saw his face and was just pissed off.

What he did is he's just the biggest vagina in the world. He just brings everyone down.

Take you and your mangina and get the f**k out of my townhouse.

Every girl we meet, we f**k, then we never talk to them again. We make it mad awkward. We burn bridges. We just f**k girls.

I think I'm gonna ask Heavy if he's gay. I would still chill with him if he was gay.

Do you think that was her first time getting it from the back? I don't think so.

She said she would try everything once.

Those kids are so excited to throw down.

Have you ever been in a situation where you're f**kin' a girl and you're just like, this is so gross.

I'm gonna text her "do you have any hot friends who wanna smoke?"

Would you have to go to California to bang girls like that?

Cops should treat criminals with more respect. Without them they would have no job.

Imagine if I had three grand, we could get three escorts in here.

If you get a girl with hot friends, you know, c'mon.

You shoulda had Juliet come up so we could have piped her.

She's either a lesbian or she loves black dick.

You wanna set the standard with your dick, no substitutes.

I've put my finger in a few girls' butts. It's like a Chinese finger trap. I would never think about putting my dick in there.

You got kicked out for punchin' a kid in the face? That's stupid.

It's ridiculous how many connects I have. One goes out, I have three others.

I'm thinkin' about just smokin' him in the face.

More bullshit, I should have expected that

So basically I have absolutely nothing in common with my roommates. I would not be the least bit surprised if I don't stay in touch with these guys at all once we graduate, even though I've lived with them for three of the past four years, and one of them for all four years. Hearing this stuff is funny, but only to an extent because I hear this everyday. I really think that Bozo and his protege are the people that all parents want their daughters staying away from. But I can't put all the blame on my roommates. Maybe they are the people that go out looking for drunk girls to have sex with, but the girls might be doing the same thing. So they deserve each other.

I also find Bozo's affection for the cat, Wiz, highly entertaining. I think he treats that cat with more respect than some of the girls he's been with. He just wants to get it in with them, but he tells Wiz what a good boy he is and how he loves him. He refers to the cat as his son. But when it comes to girls, other people, there's only one thing he wants. After he gets it, there's a good chance he'll never speak to them again. Certainly is an interesting life style, but I bet there are a lot of people in the world like him.

There's only a little more than a month left of school, but I'm sure that is plenty of time to compile more outrageous dialogue. You can count on me to continue listening, as if I had a choice, unless my ears begin internally bleeding from all this crap.

Things My Roommates Say

Unfortunately, February has marked a month of very little blogging. I have been busy with school work and I've recently become addicted to Fifa Ultimate Team on Fifa 12 and Borderlands. Basically I've spent free time playing video games instead of blogging. However, I did have an idea for a blog post or possibly even multiple posts that require very little work from me. I mentioned in a recent post that I have very little in common with the people I live with at school. The differences in our personalities and interests reach incredibly comical levels. I often find myself amused and or disgusted with a rather large portion of their dialogue. Usually I hear this crap while I'm doing homework at night, but practically every time one of them opens their mouth. I wish I had this idea earlier, but I am going to record the things they say here for our enjoyment.

Bozo

I was going to get up at eight today, but that didn't happen. The thing is, I'm still going to 2/3 of my classes, I just have so many of them.

This is our last chance, we're about to be professional business men. I think we should pull the job.

Dude, you can't drink everclear.

Dude, you can't bring your girl. Not if we're going to be planning this thing out.

Did you hear I got hit with reckless driving?

The Valentine worked. It kind of sucks because I have to buy her drinks now.

You're gonna have to hit him in the face, but I thought you would like that.

I'm just gonna feed the kid whiskey.

Dude, we need another goon.

That girl **** said she was fantasizing about me in class.

I piped some gross chick at the bar. Now I have to figure out how to handle it.

He's a ginger, a walking vagina.

This is gonna be so much easier since I'm making up my sources.

I still can't believe Jay was sleeping next to the dead body, holy shit.

Not much, I've been smoking and drinking a lot. Living the life.

You know what the sexiest thing is about that girl? Her voice. I just wanna fuck the shit out of her.

She wanted to f**k in the woods.

I was riding it from behind the whole night.

She has like 40 condoms. She said "you gotta help me use all these."

There were pictures of her boyfriend EVERYwhere.

For all the emotional stuff she can go to her boyfriend, for all that bullshit. She can come to me for dick.

Two of the last three girls I've fucked have boyfriends. Shows how much that means.

I'm good for dick, and dick only.

Bozo's Sidekick

I don't know, that girl never even accepted my Facebook friend request.

I think that kid's pretty cool if he's bringing up three kegs this weekend.

Do you believe in love? I don't even know what I would say to that.

I used the name "Bozo" for one of my roommates because that is his code-name among some of my friends at school, so they all know what I'm talking about. And by all, I mean that three people probably know who I'm referring to. His sidekick is another one of my roommates who tends to follow Bozo around. I gathered the dialogue above over the course of roughly two weeks. I will continue to listen for the duration of the semester and most likely will post some more of the ridiculous things I hear. Sometimes its funny, and sometimes its extremely annoying, aggravating, or makes me wish I had ear plugs.

Blogging in general has been at a standstill, at least from the perspective of readers looking for more posts. Get it, because barely anyone reads this shit! However, I have been working on some pieces, I've just been real slow putting an entire post together. My last post, which is dated the first of this month, even though I started and wrote the majority of it on the last day of January, touched on the good mood I was in. I can gladly say that I have maintained this happiness over the course of this month, but it sure has been busy. This upcoming weekend is the first one in which I will not be attending a track meet since I arrived back from winter break and my some of my former roommates are supposed to be visiting this weekend. What perfect timing! Should be a great weekend!

College Living: The Townhouse

Senior year in college has been much different simply because I no longer live in a typical dorm. I'm still on campus, but I live an area a bit removed from the rest of the school in a townhouse. I really like this style, no more meal plan, I cook for myself and I have a single. I live with four friends from school (there are five of us total in case you can't count/are confused) and it's quite hilarious given everyone's different lifestyles. Getting along with them isn't hard, but I find myself so different than them that it really is comical, especially from my perspective. One of my roommates is very messy, in the kitchen and just in general. It's annoying and funny how he just leaves his dishes and dirty utensils and cups in the sink. I will wash them or put them in the dishwasher, but only because I might need to use them. I think he's just used to not washing anything at home that he doesn't realize we, his roommates, are the ones who have to clean his shit. That's just the kitchen, though. Get a look at these pictures of the bathroom.

 Yes, all those towels are his. I think there are four in the picture, but I am rather certain that I have seen more. And yes, those are the tops of fast food cups on the counter top next to his male fitness magazines. I didn't get a picture of it, but his clothes were also scattered about the floor. I'll be able to get a good shot of that soon. The bathroom was recently cleaned by one of my other roommates, but the toilet is clogged now (again) and I'm sure that the clothing and towels will begin to build yet again. What I find amazing about this is how he can just leave his towels and clothing on the bathroom floor... for weeks. Guess he's not too worried about them getting dirty. I wonder if he uses the towels off the floor? He was also my roommate freshman year and I remember one of my towels going missing. I think I know where it ended up now, the floor. I'll have to get a picture of the sink sometime, but that won't be hard. I usually find myself fuming in the kitchen more than once each week, so I can bet on that happening again very, very soon. The more I think about it, the more I think that I'll probably be in that situation tomorrow. Regardless of when I actually post this, I will probably find myself in that situation tomorrow. In case you don't get it, the sink is full of dirty shit all the time.

I am quite happy to prepare my own meals, though. I have certainly taken a liking to cooking. My cooking expertise lacks depth right now, I only know how to prepare a few different dishes, but I think they sure are coming out well. Learning by doing and experimenting is how I've been operating. My roommate, the messy one I was talking about before, actually told me that he thinks I am by far the best cook in the townhouse. I'll take the compliment, but I'm also willing to actually prepare my meals. Often my roommates have frozen meals or meals that do not require much preparation at all. I don't think the meals I make are complicated, but they do take a little bit of time to prepare sometimes, but it is always worth it. Even when I haven't done it completely correct, the end result still tastes good so I could care less because the next time it will be even better!

Must be hard to screw this up

I'm a huge fan of stir fry, which also isn't very hard to prepare. I just like the idea of cooking a bunch of vegetable and some type of meat and dumping it on top of rice. Always tastes so good! Last year I ate stir fry practically everyday in the dining hall, but now I get to chose what kind I have and I don't need to hope that the lunch serves don't completely flood the whole thing with sauce. Sometimes they put so much sauce on the meal that it looked kind of like soup. Best of all, though, no more waiting in the tremendously long, slow line for stir fry. Along with cooking/preparing meals is getting the ingredients. I do grocery shopping now! I actually like grocery shopping because I'm in total control over what I want to buy. I have fun buying food with the knowledge that I'm going to cook it and eat it! And that it will be delicious of course. In my estimation, my cooking skills have grown significantly since I moved in to the townhouse in September. I also might have mentioned before that one of my friends from school is studying abroad this semester, but she told me that she wants me to cook her some meals when she gets back so it's a good thing I'm getting in some practice now!

While going through the random pictures I have from this year, I came across one from the first full weekend of school. That weekend there is an event that has become known as "Around the World." Basically townhouses prepare different shots and the rest of the school comes down to the townhouses to take a shot at each house. This isn't my thing at all, but it sure is hilarious to watch. What I found really funny was my townhouse's shot. My roommate, the messy one again (he's quite a character), and his friend from back home were talking up how awesome the shot they were going to have was going to be so great. They called it PMV, but I will not say what that stands for because it is somewhat vulgar. You might be able to guess yourself, so go ahead! Come the night of Around the World, all the people coming into our townhouse would take a shot of our stuff and continually say how they didn't like it. After all the hype and talk about how good the drink was, it turned out to be a huge bust. Who would have guessed?!

The picture above shows all the alcohol that my housemates gathered for the weekend. Quite a variety, but Busch light, come on, everyone knows that beer sucks.That weekend was certainly interesting. For some reason we have a bunch of sand outside the back door of our townhouse and during Around the World there was some precipitation. This led to one hell of a mess in our common area. There was mud and dirt all over the floor. I should have taken a picture of that, but we were all too concerned with getting the place cleaned first. I don't think the floor has fully recovered from that weekend yet. It's still somewhat dirty, but we barely use the common area for anything, which I find comical. We basically only go down there to use the kitchen to prepare meals. We barely ever eat down there, I eat most of my meals in my room. I attribute this to the fact that we rarely eat at the same times. I'd rather eat in my room than sit at our table in the common area and eat by my lonesome. We go down there to use the other bathroom, too, now that the upstairs toilet is clogged, again, one or two days after we just unclogged it.

One of the biggest things that has happened recently is quite random. I believe it happened two weekends ago. I remember getting up that Sunday morning, it was a normal Sunday morning, nothing unusual. I was just chilling in my room before the rest of my roommates got up (they sleep in much later than I do). Once they finally did wake up, I could hear them speaking about how they had a cat and that they were going to raise it. My messy roommate had an apartment with some friends during the summer and one of his friends living with him had a cat. Apparently the cat got pregnant and had four kittens I believe. My roommate decided to take one of the cats with him and raise it in our townhouse. The kitten is living with us now and has been name Wiz (Whiz, I don't know how to spell it). I believe he named him after the rapper, I don't know why though. I thought the name was very appropriate at first because the cat was peeing on them and their beds. He's grown up a lot since then. He knows to use the litter to do business and he's actually very people friendly.

He looks so cute, right? Well he is, but he can be a little bastard. He scratched one of my roommates on the face already, not too bad, but he still did it. His claws are just really sharp. Wiz also likes footwear and climbing things. The best part about the whole thing is what my roommate is trying to use the cat for. He constantly shows girls Wiz. He does this because he thinks it will help him get an in with them! Absolutely hysterical!

So that's what's going down in the townhouse. Well, there is some other stuff going on, but I don't want to discuss that right now (bet you can guess). That means it's random picture time!

Cheap Machete at Walmart, only $6.88!

Spectacular Parking Job!

Counterfeit Windows!