Things My Roommates Say

Unfortunately, February has marked a month of very little blogging. I have been busy with school work and I've recently become addicted to Fifa Ultimate Team on Fifa 12 and Borderlands. Basically I've spent free time playing video games instead of blogging. However, I did have an idea for a blog post or possibly even multiple posts that require very little work from me. I mentioned in a recent post that I have very little in common with the people I live with at school. The differences in our personalities and interests reach incredibly comical levels. I often find myself amused and or disgusted with a rather large portion of their dialogue. Usually I hear this crap while I'm doing homework at night, but practically every time one of them opens their mouth. I wish I had this idea earlier, but I am going to record the things they say here for our enjoyment.

Bozo

I was going to get up at eight today, but that didn't happen. The thing is, I'm still going to 2/3 of my classes, I just have so many of them.

This is our last chance, we're about to be professional business men. I think we should pull the job.

Dude, you can't drink everclear.

Dude, you can't bring your girl. Not if we're going to be planning this thing out.

Did you hear I got hit with reckless driving?

The Valentine worked. It kind of sucks because I have to buy her drinks now.

You're gonna have to hit him in the face, but I thought you would like that.

I'm just gonna feed the kid whiskey.

Dude, we need another goon.

That girl **** said she was fantasizing about me in class.

I piped some gross chick at the bar. Now I have to figure out how to handle it.

He's a ginger, a walking vagina.

This is gonna be so much easier since I'm making up my sources.

I still can't believe Jay was sleeping next to the dead body, holy shit.

Not much, I've been smoking and drinking a lot. Living the life.

You know what the sexiest thing is about that girl? Her voice. I just wanna fuck the shit out of her.

She wanted to f**k in the woods.

I was riding it from behind the whole night.

She has like 40 condoms. She said "you gotta help me use all these."

There were pictures of her boyfriend EVERYwhere.

For all the emotional stuff she can go to her boyfriend, for all that bullshit. She can come to me for dick.

Two of the last three girls I've fucked have boyfriends. Shows how much that means.

I'm good for dick, and dick only.

Bozo's Sidekick

I don't know, that girl never even accepted my Facebook friend request.

I think that kid's pretty cool if he's bringing up three kegs this weekend.

Do you believe in love? I don't even know what I would say to that.

I used the name "Bozo" for one of my roommates because that is his code-name among some of my friends at school, so they all know what I'm talking about. And by all, I mean that three people probably know who I'm referring to. His sidekick is another one of my roommates who tends to follow Bozo around. I gathered the dialogue above over the course of roughly two weeks. I will continue to listen for the duration of the semester and most likely will post some more of the ridiculous things I hear. Sometimes its funny, and sometimes its extremely annoying, aggravating, or makes me wish I had ear plugs.

Blogging in general has been at a standstill, at least from the perspective of readers looking for more posts. Get it, because barely anyone reads this shit! However, I have been working on some pieces, I've just been real slow putting an entire post together. My last post, which is dated the first of this month, even though I started and wrote the majority of it on the last day of January, touched on the good mood I was in. I can gladly say that I have maintained this happiness over the course of this month, but it sure has been busy. This upcoming weekend is the first one in which I will not be attending a track meet since I arrived back from winter break and my some of my former roommates are supposed to be visiting this weekend. What perfect timing! Should be a great weekend!

Trending For the Best

I remember going through high school and remember enjoying each year better than the last. Happily, I can report that I feel the same way about college because I think senior year is shaping up to an exciting and enjoyable collegiate climax. Fall semester of senior year I had a good set of classes with some great professors, especially Dr. K, one of the most likable people I've ever met. I would also like to note that I spoke with the Legendary Dr. K on the phone once, too! Cross that off the list of things to do. Classes so far this semester will be more of a pain in the ass in my estimation, mainly because I have two accounting classes that will cause me pain all the way until graduation. However, enduring until graduation is possible and there are plenty of things to distract me from my dislike of the subject. I would also like to announce that I have gained one more reader, adding on to my impressive total that I can still count on one hand. The new reader is a former teammate of mine from high school and one of my very good friends for so many reasons. Here's a shout out to him:

Actually, now that I'm looking at this picture of him eating some type of uber-sub, I am reminded of another time we dined together back circa sophomore or junior year of high school. I was at my house with three friends from the high school track team, we were playing Halo I believe. My parents decided to order a pizza and the special pizza offer for the week was some sausage pizza with lots of meat on it. I remember when my dad asked us if it was okay to order that pizza my friend, pictured above, said something about enjoying a sausagey sensation in his mouth. I need say no more.

Getting back to more current news, today was a great day. The highlight of the day was lunch, which I had with a lovely young lady. I am speaking of my friend that spent last semester studying abroad in Italy. She's the one I mentioned something about cooking dinner for this semester, but that might come later on. This was the first chance we had to really speak since she got back and it was quite enjoyable. We were able to visit for just about an forty-five minutes before parting to go to class, but it certainly was a quick forty-five minutes. Hopefully we'll be hanging out on a regular basis this semester, but at this point, she's probably the closest female friend I have ever had.

I can't help but realize how much I don't have in common with my roommates. I actually find it quite funny, I do have some similarities with them and we get along just fine, but the dissimilarities are staggering. Mainly because they smoke all day and I tend to do work, blog, read, or play video games. Sometimes we play video games together and watch sports together, but outside of that I don't really do anything with my roommates. But enough about that, I'm in a good mood today and I can't even find the words to complain about anything and do it justice. So I'm going to take a look at things that I find enjoyable for various different reasons, hope you enjoy.

Are those dildos in his hands?

Fractured Tibia! I don't want to see any patients lying around in bed!

Holy shit! There it is revealed in all of it's glory, the mystery of the name Toninho revealed. The unveiling of my true name comes because I could no longer hold on to this priceless image from a game of Words with Friends with Chase. Please continue to observe this picture and appreciate it for what it is. Also, the previous stream of photos and videos sums up what I do with my free time. What can I say, I just enjoy to laugh and entertain myself.

Well, it is past midnight now and I need to get some sleep. I hope you got a laugh or two out of this post, but I'm just in a good mood and thought I would share some happiness with everyone! I'll be back soon to shed light on topics I find interesting!

Life, Complaining About Barcelona, and Some More Life

I have recently moved back into school in preparation for spring semester of senior year of college. I must say I found myself pleasantly surprised by how winter break ended. Multiple times I have discussed my frustration in attempts to hang out with friends. One of the not so great things about growing up is that practically everyone you know is busy most of the time with various activities such as school, work, homework, studying, lying, avoiding, hiding, jerking it, you know, the usual stuff. However, over the last week of this winter break I actually spent a decent amount of time with friends and had a good time. I went to a couple of my friends' apartment and hung out there/went to a billiards place not too far away and played billiards! Chase and I were also able to successfully orchestrate a friends dinner before most of us left for school. Including the two of us, we had nine people at dinner! I have a hard time planning things where three of my friends can actually attend so this felt unbelievable.

I have Sports Center on right now and I just saw the top 10 plays. To my surprise number 1 and two were given to the two goals that Inter Milan scored today in its Copa Italia match. Maicon, who scored a nice goal today, was awarded the number one spot and I found it funny that the anchor was not sure how to pronounce his name. I find the stereotypical American soccer ignorance funny, but it's about time soccer got some respect in the country. I am going to post a video from YouTube of Maicon's goal, but I have no idea how long it will last because there is a good chance that it could be removed from YouTube for copyright infringement or something. Also, if you don't know, Maicon is a defender. That little bit of knowledge should be taken into account when you see this ridiculous shot. I'm not sure if I've mentioned it before, but I am an Inter Milan fan. My support of Inter is 100% due to Ronaldo, my favorite athlete of all time. He was playing for Inter Milan when I started getting into soccer and the rest is easy to figure out.

How great is it that the next World Cup, in 2014, will be held in Brazil? What a great country to host the event simply because of the passion with which Brazilians follow and play the sport. I don't know if it will be possible, but it would be phenomenal to go back to Brazil during the World Cup. I have a few good memories of Brazil, which I have started posting (and by that I mean that there is one post so far), and I think it would be great to go back down there. And of course, there would be no better time than during the World Cup. I'll have to dedicate a post regarding the status of the country of Brazil during a World Cup. I had the privilege to experience that atmosphere during the 1998 World Cup and my dad told me some funny stories from work during this time. I'll hopefully get to those at some point.

Unfortunately my soccer enjoyment continues to be hindered by Barcelona and its group of self righteous pricks that currently makeup the team. Am I the only one who grows tired of different players from Barcelona hailing themselves as the greatest team or Messi as the greatest player practically each week? My favorite game of the past few years was definitely when Inter Milan beat Barcelona 3-1 in the first leg of their semi-final tie in the Champions League in 2010. It was so satisfying to read all the Barcelona fans' bitching about how Milito's goal in that game was offside, because it wasn't. Barcelona and all it's fans were just too but hurt to acknowledge what a great team that Inter side was.

As for Barcelona's "little genius," Messi. Barcelona doesn't need Messi, Messi needs Barcelona. I am quite confident that Barcelona could win without the services of its hobbit-looking "messiah." Messi, however, definitely could not produce the way he has with Barcelona with another club. We probably will never see this because there is no reason for Messi to leave Barcelona, and I do not fault him for that. I wouldn't leave them if I were him either. I just think it would be interesting to see Messi play against Barcelona just to see if the media shit all over him for "not showing up in big games" like CR7 when it is almost impossible to get any touches on the ball because the opponent just passes it back and forth 3,299,384 times and then proclaims what great passers Xavi and Iniesta are because they completed 98.476% of their passes, of which 2% had any chance of getting intercepted or denied by opposing players.

Maybe I'm just a bitter shithead, but I really cannot stand Barcelona FC right now. The Spanish League is going to shit because of Real Madrid and Barcelona, no other team has a chance to win La Liga. I hope that some team rises to the occasion and rapes in the Champions League, like Inter did in the 2009-2010 campaign. Oh yeah, I'm also going to call this right now, Barcelona will make a big deal out of it's inevitable Copa del Rey title later this year when they win it since they have practically already knocked out Real Madrid from this tournament already, its only competition. They'll make a big deal out of it and talk about how winning the title shows the club's superiority over every other team anywhere. Yet when they lost the Copa del Rey last season to Real Madrid it didn't matter because it was only the Copa del Rey and no one really cares, but they should care if Barcelona wins it. I'm calling that right now, so everyone can tell me I was right in a few months and give me a high five or something.

Enough of this gay banter, though. I only have to take four classes this semester to graduate! I hope I don't screw anything up because I can't afford to drop any classes! I did manage to get out of Corporate Taxation, though, and that, in the words of Martha Stewart, is a good thing. This could be the last semester of classes, but there's always grad school which is quickly becoming as mandatory as attending college if you don't want to work at McDonald's for a career. I don't know which would be better: getting a job or going to grad school. Both probably suck, so I'm just going to enjoy my time at school for this semester, throw my name in for some jobs and maybe get an interview or two, and surround myself with people I like, or try to at least. This semester has potential to be great, so hopefully you'll be seeing good posts here, along with my usual rants about random things, cough Barcelona. Stay tuned for more!

Larry the Lizard

The struggle for content, other than a more thought provoked piece that I am in the process of writing, has met an end, for now at least, as I have stumbled upon some old photographs that have had me thinking of the past. At one point in my life I lived in Brazil and I must say that the memories are favorable. Many people around my age study abroad for a semester, but my family and I lived abroad for three years. In these three years I developed a good feeling toward Brazil, a country filled with wild nature, an unimaginable amount of potential, and some very friendly people. Upon rediscovering these photographs, I shall recount some tales of this truly wonderful experience.

The second year of our expedition, second grade for me, my family and I were placed at a house in the small town of Jaguariuna. Jaguarinua, located in the state of Sao Paulo, resides in a country setting lacking the sky scrapers and pollution of the large metropolis that is the city of Sao Paulo. The house we lived in was positioned on a large piece of land granting us great privacy and lots of room to run around and soak up ultra violet rays from the sun (which is what I did the majority of every day). In the front of the house we had a quite large in-ground pool! My sister and I spent countless hours swimming and imagining that we were stranded on a raft in an endless ocean. My sister and I basically lived outside, I only went inside to watch soccer (big surprise there), play 3D Space Cadet Pinball, or go to bed. I also fell asleep a few times outside swinging in a hammock. The back of the house was a barbecue area, which is where this first story begins.

Front view of the house

 In the barbecue area there was a sink, and one day I found myself in need of washing my hands while outside. I went to the sink out back and while I had one hand placed under the faucet and the other reaching for the knob, a small gecko leaped onto my hand. Fascinated by this tiny lizard, I stopped and just stared at it. I had seen many similar looking geckos in the house, they had taken up residence and helped us out by eating annoying flies. Interestingly this little guy was not moving, he (I decided the gecko was a male, but who knows) just sat there rather comfortably. I hastily decided that this gecko was my friend and I declared him Larry. Larry was my new pet and I was determined to care for the little gecko. So I retrieved my critter box that I had previously used many times to intercept and remove unwanted spiders from the house. There was a large gap between the bottom of our front door and the ground which allowed these hairy arachnids entry. I put my new friend, Larry, into the critter box so I could monitor and protect him.

Larry! 

The picture above shows Larry chilling on my left index finger. As you can tell I only had on shorts and underwear. I spent most of my time like this, must be what Matthew McConaughey feels like. I just remember the intriguing thoughts about why the gecko stayed put, barely moving at all. After a little while, I decided that I should get Larry some food because he must be hungry. It was time for some hunting, second grade style. Judging from Larry's size, I thought he must need something small to eat. So I had the idea of bringing him back some ants. There are so many different species of ants, some nasty, inhabiting our yard, never mind the country. In my limited knowledge, I only recognized two different types of ants in our yard. There were the black ants with the large jaws that had bitten my feet plenty of times or my hand when I rescued them from certain death in the pool, the ungrateful bastards. I also recognized the leaf-cutter ants, they were the ones that cut leaves from the trees and bushes, what a great process I had to go through to figure that one out. I must say that it was quite remarkable to watch the leaf-cutter ants in action. These guys clearly have a plan and I had a blast watching them. Some of the leaf-cutter ants would go up into the trees and bushes and cut the leaves loose with their strong jaws. Meanwhile, a line that could be traced back to the ant nest moved the severed leaves creating two-lane traffic. One lane marched from the nest to the tree undergoing cutting, while the other lane marched back to the nest carrying leaves, quite fascinating.

So I brought back some ants for Larry to chow on, or so I thought. What happened was interesting and could have been described as sadistic had I known what the results would be. After I released the ants into the critter box a battle that would end with death began. The ants swarmed Larry and began either biting or stinging, perhaps both, his innocent lizard flesh. Not knowing what to do, I watched in horror as the ants clearly dominated the fight. The food I had brought back for Larry killed him. At first Larry attempted to free himself from the merciless foe I had bestowed upon him, but alas he was no match for the ants. Larry's movements began to slow and soon after stopped. I stared at the lifeless body that now represented my ex-friend, Larry. While we were friends for mere hours, I had grown some sort of attachment to the little guy. With the help of my sister, we buried Larry's miniature corpse in front of our house. Not long after, I decided for some strange reason that I wanted to dig him back up, resurrect Larry. My sister helped me with this too, but despite leaving a marker, kind of like a tombstone, where we buried him, we never found his body.

Despite the tragic ending to the story, I still consider this a good memory. Brazil, what a place. I hope to go back again some day. I plan on releasing more Brazil stories/memories which can be portrayed with justice now that I have photographic evidence of what I am speaking of. And Larry, you will not be forgotten.

Look, I Made a Post

December of 2011 marked a low point with merely one post. I have been busy with finals, track, and holiday festivities as well as hanging out with my family. Now most of the festivities have come to an end and I've had enough relaxation time away from school work to have some blogging fun. For the most part I haven't done anything of much importance for the last few weeks, but I'll discuss this time frame regardless. I would also like to point out that my post about how life is like Mario Party/Fuzion Frenzy has been put on a huge delay, we can all thank finals for that. BUT, I will get back to that at some point, I just do not want to rush it. And I need to read everything that I previously wrote and pick up where I left off, such unfortunate timing really, I finally had a good, unique idea, and....... finals!

And now for something completely different: my return to the cinema to work. Yes, for the first time in my life I have worked during winter break. I don't mind, though, I will only work for a few short weeks and I actually don't mind most of the people that I work with. When I went in for duty on Saturday my manager had not told my fellow coworkers that I was back, so my arrival was a complete surprise which was actually very nice, better than if they had all known. I received lots of handshakes and hugs. Surprise reactions are always the best. After I said hello to the coworkers who were in the front lobby, I headed to the ushers' closet to put my coat somewhere (this is the first time I've every worn a coat to work). One of my other coworkers happened to be eating lunch in the back lobby, where I was headed. She didn't look my way as I walked over, so I said "hi." She responded with a disinterested "hey." That is until she looked up. Classic surprise reaction once she looked up. She bolted out of the chair to give me a hug when she realized it was me. These types of reactions from the people I work with are the reason I go back. I'm very different than my coworkers, but they are certainly not a bad group. I would have to say that my first day back on the job surprised my coworkers in about the same fashion that Chelsea fans and players get surprised when Fernando Torres scores a goal. Unlike Torres, mt surprise was worth the wait.

I know, I didn't score the goal

While on the subject of work, I would also like to point out that on Sunday I popped popcorn (not pupcorn) for about four and a half hours. This was the first time I have performed this task, so it really wasn't that bad, but I can see how it can get annoying very quickly. Besides work, which has only been two days, I've spent my time training, hanging out with family members, and playing video games. Training is always interesting at this time of year. The weather is frigid and facilities are lacking, so that means I do the vast majority of training for track outside in the cold. I want to perform well this year in track, but I really don't think my goals/ views meet what the new sprints coach has in mind for me. This brings about an interesting situation. As I mentioned before, actually in the previous post, I have been a hurdler throughout my track career and have achieved some level of success in the event. However, I honestly think that the new sprint coach would rather me drop everything and run the 800 (that's a half mile for people not track inclined). So I guess we'll just wait and see what happens, and I should probably stop blogging about this before it ends up as a controversy on Sports Center (because that could totally happen).

In other breaking news, I am apparently four classes (sometime referred to as courses) away from eligibility to partake in "professional" work. More like after sitting in a classroom for a certain amount of hours I will be deemed capable and well rounded. Educational institutes have an affinity with the phrase "well rounded." Educators are quite sure that beating knowledge into the nation's youth creates a well rounded person. So, come May of 2012, just a few months away now, my life is probably going to change significantly. I think there are four possible scenarios:

1. I don't graduate and have to continue taking undergrad classes (I really hope this doesn't happen)
2. I graduate and manage to find a job
3. I graduate and join unemployment
4. I graduate, but decide to go to graduate school

All of those scenarios sound quite thrilling. Actually, that brings me to something I've been thinking about for a little while. The way wealth works sucks. When you're young and have energy and the motivation to go do fun and exciting things you have barely any money. Most people don't have a decent amount of money to do fun and exciting things until they're old, out of shape, fat, and on six different drugs. All of which are symptoms of work. Screw that, I want to go do things now, when I am still physically capable of wiping my own ass without hurting my back. However, I lack the funds to do much of anything, what a wonderfully implemented system. Work, a fun suppressor, prevents many people from having a good time.

At least she can retire at the ripe age of 70!

At the end of this summer I had planned in my mind to write about how dumb and stupid field goals in football are once the National Football League (I did that just for the National Football League expert Jaworski) season started. I still haven't done that and the playoffs are starting this weekend. So I'm either putting that off for another year or doing it in the next couple of days/weeks. I also think that football practices score inflation. I determine football scores by taking the number of points a team has scored and dividing by six, that gives you the score with inflation calculated out of it. For example, if the scoreboard reads 27-17, the actual score of the game is 4.5-2.8333333333333.

Apparently I can't form a cohesive post anymore. According Blogger, I started this post on December 29, 2011 and I'm still working on it now in 2012. The post also has no clear thought process, so I'm not even going to bother to read what I have previously written and just start up again, right here, right now. I am currently in the latter part of winter break, it's almost time to for knowledge beating again. Once again, I can proudly say that I have done a whole lot of nothing. I just thought about ending the post with the previous sentence, but then I remembered that I don't have anything else to do right now, so I'll just keep typing away. I'll do a recap of winter break so far.

My winter break began when I ended a torturous final and drove home and ate dinner with my mom. My dad and sister arrived in that order in the next two days and I got to see them for the first time in a long time. That first week I was back I had the opportunity to see some of my friends and we went to the mall. That is also the last time I saw most of those people. I have gone back to work for a few short shifts, so I've probably made about ten dollars over break. I went to a mini-meet and ran the 400. And over the last week or so, I have unsuccessfully, at least for the most part, attempted to hang out with various friends. I'll probably give it one more shot before I decide it is no longer worth the time or effort. And now I'm here.

I watched this movie called 12 Monkeys last night. I enjoyed it, I recommend it to whoever reads this. Then I watched most of the BCS National Championship game for College football. Holy shit that game sucked in my estimation. From my point of view, the score to that game was 1-0 in favor of Alabama. Alabama only scored once, field goals are stupid and don't count. In other sporting news, Lionel Messi won the prestigious Ballon d'or award yesterday, crowning him the best soccer player this past year. In the days leading up to the event, I found all the people predicting him as the winner quite comical. No shit, anyone could have predicted that. That's like predicting the square root of nine.

Did I mention that there is a severe lack of anything to do? Over the past two years I've experienced rapidly increasing levels of apathy toward many things. I don't even expect positive responses to hanging out anymore, from most people that is. The whole situation creates what I like to call the "Fat Bastard" syndrome. I took an interpersonal communication class this past semester, a class that I really enjoyed because I like observing people and their behaviors. One of my favorite theories was the one that described why we maintain some relationships and let others dissolve. In the theory's simplest terms, the two main factors are cost and reward. We like to stay in relationships that offer more rewards than cost. I think that is true, and unfortunately I have many high bills.

It's not all lame, though, hats off to those of you that I have seen.............. STEVE HOLT!!

Mission: Out with a Bang

This past weekend we had our first indoor track meet of the season, and after two plus months of nothing but training, I was very happy to compete. I'm only 5' 8'' or 5' 9'', maybe somewhere between, but I've competed in the high hurdles since I was a freshman in high school. However, each time I have a new coach, well the two sprint coaches I've had in college, they have thought I am exclusively an intermediate hurdler when I tell them I hurdle. My coach, at first, wasn't going to let me run the hurdles at this meet and I really wanted to, so I guess I harassed him enough to the point where he let me compete in the event. I ended up running my personal best in the 55m hurdles this past Saturday, 7.88 seconds, .03 seconds off the school record. One of my teammates, without my knowledge, captured the race on his iPad! I am very thankful and have probably watched the video over one hundred times by now, and you can, too!


 

I know the video appears in a strange format, but that's probably because it was taken on an iPad, but you can see the race, and that's all that matters. I had some success in high school competing in the high hurdles, so I'm hoping that I am finding my way back to that form. I'm cutting the gap down at least, my best time in the same event in high school (high school high hurdles are 3 inches lower than college high hurdles) was 7.70 seconds, so I'm only .18 off of that now. I haven't discussed track much, if at all on this blog. I think I have only occasionally mentioned that I run track. So let me reveal some track secrets! Except that they aren't really secrets. In general I run track because of the hurdle event. I have come to really enjoy hurdling over the years, and have now been doing it for almost eight years. I did not realize how long I've been doing this now.

In high school I got progressively better each year, building up to the thrilling climax of senior year. I reside in Massachusetts, which also happens to produce relatively good hurdlers comparatively to the rest of New England. In fact, my year, the 2008 graduates produced a good crop of hurdlers. That year I was lucky enough to be the fifth best hurdler in the state, only four people in Massachusetts posted faster times than me. I also placed second in the New England Championship meet that year. On the way to this exciting finish I set many school records, a Central Massachusetts high hurdle record (that still stands!), and two league meet records, in the two hurdle events. All of these records still stand, so I guess I did a decent job. I told myself and my teammates senior year that I just wanted to go out with a bang, and I think I accomplished that. I want to do the same thing this year, go out of collegiate track with a bang. So I'm doing my best to return to my best form!

Besides track, I had an interesting idea last Tuesday night that I am in the process of developing a post about. I think that this post will be marginally entertaining, and also unique. The idea I had is something about how society in the United States functions. That is all I am going to say on that subject for now, so if you want, get excited!

The school doesn't care about hurdles very much... sad face

I also forgot about the disrespect the hurdles are treated with. I guess I should apologize to facilities for leaving some hurdles on the track. Apparently they hit this hurdle, didn't notice, and proceeded to rip up part of the track by dragging it for some time. On a brighter note, one of my roommates and I finished an auditing project that had been looming over us for a few weeks before Thanksgiving break (turned in November 17). After we handed it in, I decided to not go to class on Tuesday, the last class before break, because honestly, I had had enough. I didn't feel like answering auditing questions one bit. The next Thursday, after break, I was in auditing class early and I discussed a case with my professor for a few minutes. After the brief discussion was over, the dialogue went like this:

Professor: "Did you have a good Thanksgiving break?"
Me:          "Yeah, I did, I had lots of great food"

Then I was about to start going into more detail when he dropped this on me:

Professor: "Did you take the whole week off, or did you just cut my class?"

I laughed at this question because I really did just cut his class. The class is at 9:30, but it wasn't like I slept in to skip it. I went to yoga that same morning at 7 a.m. And then I went to 11:00, so yes, I did just cut his class, but he doesn't need to know that.

This sums up how much we enjoyed the project

At some point I know I mentioned that barely anyone reads any of the crap I write about on this blog, but now I think the count is up to three people! I'm heading in the right direction. Also, I pointed out that the only reason the view count goes up, besides from the three people that actually read the blog, is because the blog shows up from keyword searches in search engines, particularly Google. From time to time, and when I say this, I really mean everyday, I check to see how people come to "find" the Sycophantic Laughter via keyword searches. I actually laughed one day when "dirty jew bags" came up as a keyword that led people to my blog. And I had multiple hits from "dirty jew bags." I don't really have anything else to say on this subject, but I found it hilarious. I don't hate on Jews or anything, I just mentioned in one post that I have a Jewish roommate and he ran away when it was time to pay at the grocery store once. I only have one explanation for this, and it's simple, he's Jewish. I attached a comical drawing of a Jew to this post and there you have it, "dirty jew bags."

Evidence

And now for something completely different, again. If you read Retentive Gibberish, the blog work of Chase, me, and friends, then you know that I enjoy video games and hate them simultaneously. Recently I got the new Call of Duty, Modern Warfare 3. I've played it for a decent amount of time, the online multiplayer that is. Sometimes playing is fun, sometimes it sucks ass. I like to experiment in these games, try different game modes and a bunch of different weapons. I'm always running around like a jackass and get killed so many times from running out in the open. I don't throw out a tepee and camp by it racking up kills, in fact I can't, because I'm not patient enough nor do I have the skill to do camp. I never enrolled in boy scouts, so I lack the necessary skills. My preferred play style is, without a doubt, running and gunning. My kill:death ratio is also substantially lower than my G.P.A. All of these qualities about my playing of Call of Duty result in me not being very good at the game. I just want to have a good time.

I bring this up because the other day I was playing online, minding my own business, getting owned by most of the other people playing online. After a few games, I decided to switch to FIFA 12 since I have been neglecting it as of late. While playing FIFA I received a message from some random gamertag. Occasionally I get random messages from people about clan tryouts and stuff like that. Basically people are looking for people interested in proving themselves worthy of a clan. I never join the "party" because I don't care to play like that. I was entertained when I received this message, though:

 

I'm not completely sure, but I think this guy was offering me a spot in his clan. I can't imagine why he would want me, I'm not outstanding by any means and I don't remember doing anything particularly great. I didn't respond to this either, but I thought it was amusing. Sign me up! While on the subject of video games, I recently saw that a study conducted by a university showed that video games increased creativity. That's what I'm saying. If you don't like video games, that's fine, don't bother with them. But I don't think there's any reason to bash them. Playing video games is far more interactive than watching television and more stimulating than reading, two other highly sedentary activities. While I don't doubt that you can learn more from reading, video games are just fun. Although, I'm not surprised that Americans are concerned about how much time is spent playing video games. The lists grows longer all the time, possibly daily. Is the massive amount of time spent sitting at a desk detrimental to health, too? I guess it's not a risk if it makes someone money.

Well, I've blabbered on about a lot of nothing for long enough. I'm going to get back to analyzing Glengarry Glen Ross and Death of a Salesman. At least I now know that it takes brass balls to sell real estate, thank you Alec Baldwin. So, I run track to hurdle, I have a new piece in the making, and the semester is almost over!

One Year Anniversary!

Exactly one year ago to the day I created Sycophantic Laughter. Little did I know at the time that I would document so much shit on this blog, and I can say in honesty that it has been a joy. I have a good time looking back at the beginning of this blog. My first few posts are very raw and if you actually read the posts, you can see how the blog has transformed. I am happy with the direction I have taken with the blog. When I started, the posts were somewhat disjointed and are quite random. I do enjoy randomness quite a bit, but I have altered the randomness to fit into the events that occur in my life. The largest change I have made is blogging almost exclusively about my life and my thoughts. I enjoy doing this and I think it makes for a better comprehensive blog than the disjointed group of posts I was creating in the very beginning.

Sycophantic Laughter has been a wonderful learning experience and I hope that it continues to function as a memoir of the events in my life and a place where I can freely display my thoughts, ideas, and opinions. I remember starting this blog. I had just got back to college after Thanksgiving break and for some reason I wanted to blog. What a wonderful idea that turned out to be! Blogging is by far my favorite social networking medium. I like blogging so much because there is way more to it than any other social networking site. You don't have 140 characters to say what's on your mind and you don't have to constantly see stupid updates about your friends that you could give less than a shit about. With blogging you get to express your thoughts and ideas to the full extent. If you want to bash on something relentlessly, blogging is for you. If you want to share the events of your life, blogging is for you. If you want to express your opinion on society, blogging is for you. All of these reasons are why I blog. The substance involved in blogging is far greater than any other social networking site. If you don't enjoy writing and thoroughly expressing how you feel, blogging is not for you. I love blogging because you can expand upon your thoughts to whatever extent you desire.

Speaking of my thoughts and ideas, I'm ecstatic that my sister recently introduced me to the genius that is George Carlin! My sister suggested that I check out the stand up comedy performed by George Carlin and I can assure you that he is hilarious! He questions and pokes fun at society in a way that I wish I could. If I was a comedian I would want to be just like him because I think I view the world in a similar fashion. He, along with Dave Chappelle, are my favorite comedians. I could listen to both of them hour after hour and still find myself laughing. Chappelle is great because I don't think I've heard a joke in any of his stand up routines that I have not laughed at. Carlin is great because he shows how stupid many things in our society are. I enjoy laughing, in fact, laughing is my favorite thing to do. I spend many hours on YouTube watching comedians and funny videos. I think a lot of people need to lighten up and look on the bright side of life and I practice that every single time I blog. I like to blog, therefore I do.



There are way too many negative vibes thrown around all day, everyday. I hear it when I go to class: "now's a terrible time to be graduating." I hear it when I'm at my townhouse: "I'm so busy I don't have time to take off my suit." I hear it when I go to practice: "If you want to do that, then you can find a different coach." Maybe if everyone didn't act as such depressing fucks we could enjoy ourselves a bit. I try to enjoy myself as much as I can. Take this very moment for instance. I should probably be working on a memo and analyzing a case for auditing class, but both of those things suck ass and blogging is way more fun, so fuck them for now. I'll do that shit, but I don't want to do it right now because I want to enjoy myself. I think people are far too constrained by the bullshit rules and ideologies instilled on us from a very young age.

Bullshit, now there's a word that I very much like. I think "bullshit" might actually be my favorite word in the English language. I like "bullshit" so much because it accurately describes so much of life. Work is bullshit, education (to a certain extent) is bullshit, business is bullshit, and the list goes on and on and on. Tests, exams, quizzes, they're all bullshit, too. I am so sick and tired of taking tests. I don't think tests prove anything except how well you can take the test. Tests are bullshit because you have no resources, I need say no more. There's even a degree named after the wonderful word, the BS. Instead of bitching about what is bullshit, I would rather look at the beautiful word and think about how useful it is in communication. Everyone who is reading this, go on and say "bullshit" out loud right now, you'll feel better.



You know what bothered me today, on the fucking one year anniversary of Sycophantic Laughter (the audacity, another one of my favorite words!), one of my professors shit on video gaming. He said something about how playing video games is a waste of time that could be spent doing something else. Well, speak for yourself. I can't stand the amount of shit that video games take. Here's some more bullshit, who would have guessed. Video games get blamed for violence, obesity, and are considered a waste of time. So instead of playing a video game I should read my accounting book. I'll SIT around (obesity risk!), learn nothing because the book is as interesting as a blank wall (waste of time risk!), and proceed to get outrageously angry at how bullshit all the information is (violence risk!). I am probably alone on this, but I get significantly more angry at many academic books than I do at anything else. It might be strange, but it is absolutely true. Video games are not as bad as the media and some people make them out to be. I like to have fun, that's probably why I like video games. All the things that are fun are the same things that I'm always told are a waste of time. I would rather blog than do my homework. I would rather play video games than study. I would rather read the books I want to read than the books I'm told to read. I have to say, I feel rather oppressed sometimes. There are too many customary standards. I don't think I'm a retard just because I get Cs in my accounting classes. I hate accounting, it's bullshit because it's all completely made up. If for some reason there was a revolution because all the blind people realized what bullshit they are subject to on a daily basis, then all these business experts would be screwed. Business, the way it works, is completely arbitrary. Science, language, mathematics, and communication, you can't change them. The real experts reside in these fields.

This turned out to be a much longer post than I had originally planned. I only wanted to pay my respects to the one year anniversary of Sycophantic Laughter and I ended up going off on a few tangents. However, this post shows how Sycophantic Laughter has evolved and matured over the year period. The randomness of this particular entry is what I was referring to at the beginning. My posts are random, but only due to the randomness of my thoughts. I love random! I also love happiness, which I am experiencing currently. I've watched a lot of comedy today, including George Carlin, Rodney Dangerfield, and Yakov Smirnoff (who Chase just introduced me to today!), while getting some bullshit school work done as well. I'm happy that I got to see a few of my friends over Thanksgiving break and that I've reestablished communication with some friends who I've not spoken to in quite some time. What a great day for Sycophantic Laughter, thank you all for reading!

I Can't Get Enough of this Guy!

The sheer brilliance that is Dr. K never ceases to amaze me. I have to acknowledge this guy's greatness before doing anything else. I'm putting the post I was working on for the study I performed a month ago on hold just to give Dr. K the attention he deserves. I love this guy! Dr. K fires on all cylinders all day, every day. He was speaking about unemployment today, more specifically on how the way the government reports unemployment statistics is bullshit. He has a point, too. He handed us an article from October 24, 2011 titled What Is the Real Unemployment Rate? Turns out the government leaves many people who don't have jobs out of the equation, in the words of Dr. K, bullshit!

Dr. K in all his glory!

He also told us a personal story about when he was diagnosed with cancer. This is a sad subject, but he found a way to make it absolutely hysterical. The way he introduced it was even comical. He was talking about how some years ago he had a doctor's appointment and the results yielded that he had testicular cancer, or as he referred to it, "cancer in the balls." Then Dr. K went on to tell us how he went to many different doctors to discuss treatment of the cancer before it got too late. While I cannot remember the specific names he gave to the procedures, I remember very well how he described each process. One of the doctors told him he could remove the cancerous area by cutting it off. "Snip snip" as Dr. K referred to the process, I think you know what this means (cut IT off, it referring to the "sack"). The doctor also told Dr. K that this would cause incontinence. Dr. K told him he could not have that because he's a teacher, "I can't be walking around all day peeing myself." The doctor's response to this was that he could wear a diaper. Dr. K: "Yeah, I'll wear a diaper" (as he proceeded to raise his middle finger and perform the "fuck you" arm motion, for lack of a better word. I wonder if that motion has a name. I'll have to find out.). I can say with absolute certainty that I have never witnessed another teacher/professor do this, though. I cannot stress how much I wish I was related to this guy in some way! I could listen to him day after day, the hilarity is like nothing I have experienced before.

This is very similar to the gesture I reference , does it have a name?

Another doctor told Dr. K that he could perform a procedure where he could "shoot" the cancer with radiation. The only problem is that he wouldn't hit it every time. His reaction spoken in my lingo: "yeah, I'm definitely doing that." Or even better yet, "go pound sand," (inside joke alert). Keep in mind that this is a story Dr. K is telling us during class. He goes on to tell us that another doctor tells him he can freeze the cancer, or in Dr. K's words, "they put your nuggets in a freezer." Once he said this, I was laughing hard enough that I felt some tears gathering in my eyes. Once again, something I have never experienced in a classroom before, and during a class. There was another doctor who had yet another procedure, but I cannot remember it, probably because I was too busy laughing. He finally found a doctor who could help him out with a more precise way of hitting the cancer with radiation or something like that. The process was more careful and took longer, but it saved his life, completely worth it.

Frozen Nuggets!

I am very grateful that he was able to find a good doctor, but the story does not end there. Dr. K told us he got a bill from the hospital for $2,500 to speak with the doctors about the possible treatments. To make matters worse, his insurance was not going to cover any of it. Of course Dr. K found this complete bullshit, he had only been in the doctors' offices for a few brief minutes to discuss treatment possibilities. He called the hospital to tell them that he thought this bill was absurd. They told him that they had a "white knight (night?)" for him to speak to. Dr. K called this "white knight" and said he sounded like one of the guys from the Godfather on the phone, like a mobster. Dr. K explained his situation to this guy. The "white knight" told him "he would take care of it." Later on Dr. K received a call from his insurance company and the person on the line apologized to him and said his insurance would cover the costs of the doctors visits. Just take a moment to let this all sink in.

And one last thing about Dr. K's class today. Back on the subject of unemployment and money. Dr. K told us he knew someone who made $11 million last year and his job was J.O. He asked if anyone knew what J.O. was and someone in the back of the class said jacking off. This was the correct answer!

The Results are In!

I don't know how, but I almost forgot about the study I was conducting. I conducted a survey on my Facebook "friends" on October 5, 2011, and I've had the results folded up and concealed in my room somewhere for about a month now. I guess it's about time that show my findings. I am aware that you all know how much I dislike Facebook, but this survey actually has nothing to do with my hatred for the site. The survey shows how much my life has changed over the past four years, basically since I entered college. So take a moment to rejoice over the fact that I am not going negative Nancy on social networking, and you should all thank Chase Robertson for this because he is helping me cease to post as such a negative prick so often. Also you should go check out his blog and his latest article because both kick ass. But don't forget your shark repellent.

Do not leave home without it

The reason I started this study was because of my curiosity in how much interaction I actually have with my "friends." One of the good things I found is that I have never spoken with only three people on my friends list. I think that is an impressive number and I am willing to bet that most people have way more than three "friends" that they have never said one word to. I must add that this is out of 343 people, too. I know that's nothing compared to everyone else's 4,393,454 "friends," but don't try to tell me you haven't spoken with less than 1% of those people ( I used math here, 3/343 is 0.87463557%). I had to conduct the actual number generation for this study in one day (I can assure you it was as long as my.... index finger!) because of the changes in "friends" total. No I'm not popular and have an increasing total daily, I usually have less "friends" each time I log in. This doesn't bother me because I probably would not consider myself a friend of those people anyway. What I find comical is the actual process. In my case, I just don't care enough to even do that. Sure I have people on my friends list that I don't really consider to be my friend, but I sure as hell don't take the time to go remove them. I have better shit to do, like blogging for instance. I am currently sitting here, at my computer, imagining people going through their friends list deleting people. What an interesting process: here's so-and-so, they're cool so they can stay. He's cool, she's cool... wait a minute, so-and-so. Fuck them! It's such a deliberate process that I find amusing.

I held off making a Facebook profile until May of my senior year of high school. Once I got my college e-mail address I decided to create it. Upon creating the profile I friended one person: my sister. She was already attending her second year of college across the country and I thought Facebook would be a good way to stay in touch with her. If only I knew then what I was getting into (cue flashes of Holden Caulfield thoughts... if you don't get it, I feel like everyone is superficial/fake on Facebook... and if you still don't get it, then never mind). I had a good group of friends in high school and they began to add me and I added some of them. Again, I thought this was great because I would have a medium of communication with people I wasn't going to see on the regular basis that I was used to. I actually enjoyed Facebook at this point in time because it was serving the purpose I was looking for. Freshman year of college and a bit into sophomore year, Facebook was great. I did keep in touch with my friends while adding new ones I met in college and our friendships remained relatively good and strong. Sometime during sophomore year and quickly escalating during junior year, Facebook's good use evaporated for me. I attribute this to the lack of time I actually spend hanging out with my friends anymore. Actually, never mind hanging out, I don't even see my friends anymore.

As of October 5, 2011, I had 343 "friends" on Facebook. I conducted a study to discover just how much interaction I have with these "friends" currently and what I think about these "friends." The results I found backed up my thoughts. I really do feel like I don't see people anymore and that's what I found. Actually, it's not only that I don't see many of my friends anymore, I rarely even communicate with them at all. I guess I should describe the different facets of the study conducted. The study consists of four areas of focus and a subgroup of answers for each particular person involved in the study. The four areas and subgroups:

1. Last time I have spoken with (insert "friend")

• Today
• Within a week
• Within a month
• This year
• More than a year
• Never

2. How often I hangout with (insert "friend")

• Often
• Sometimes
• Rarely
• Never

3.Friend Label (who doesn't like labels?)

• Close friends (notice the lack of quotations surrounding the word friends here)
• Teammate
• Family
• Coworker
• Don't know why we're "friends" (quotations!)
• Friend
• Acquaintance

4. How I feel about (insert "friend")

• I like you
• Neutral
• I don't like you
• I hate you
• Depends
• I don't know

The simplicity of the study combined with the stunning realizations it brings about make it a study I think we should all perform. So on October 5, I embarked on the data collection! On October 5, I spoke with 21 of my "friends" at some point during that day and spoke with 15 more within that week, for a total of 36 (21+15) throughout the whole week. That number isn't too bad, at least I don't think so, given that I'm at college and people have stuff to do. What I found very alarming is that I have not spoken to 169 of my "friends" in over a year! That's very nearly half of the list of people. While at first that number is alarming, after further consideration I realized that I don't care. Out of those 169 people, only about two or three would actually have any impact on me. In other words, there are only about two or three of those people that I would like to still have communication with. Also, as I stated previously, there are only three people that I have never spoken with. I really believe that many people cannot say the same about their "friends."

I should have made this a category

One thing that's great is that I have a few of the greatest friends that I could ask for. I like this part, too, because I get to label people! I have come to the conclusion that I have seven close friends, which I think is a good amount. These are the people I have very frequent communication with over various medians. For instance, Chase Robertson goes to school the furthest away from me out of all my friends (notice the lack of quotations again), but I actually communicate with him the most without a doubt. In fact, over the last month or so I've had communication with him just about everyday and it's great! This is possible because we don't always use the same mode of communication. First off, we both still use AIM. I really like AIM because it works very well. AIM lets you instant message your friends without any lag and I have never experienced one issue with the service. I really think it's too bad that so few people use it anymore. Chase and I also speak with one another while at school from time to time via Xbox Live. This is really fun because we can game and have sweet conversations at the same time! And of course, we use text each other and that works very well, too.

As you can tell by acquainting yourself with the design of this study, I did not make any differentiation between males and females. However, I can tell you that out of the seven close friends I have, six are guys and one is a girl. This result also did not surprise me, and really it shouldn't because anyone should know who their close friends are. Also, I must add that I did not include any family members as close friends. Personally, I have historically spent way more time hanging out with other guys. I don't really have a precise reason for this, but I think it is just because of the way I am wired. I know a lot of guys, including a few of my roommates that try to get all the girls they can. I just don't think that way. I only want one girl, not a different one every night. I don't know why I am like that, but I've just always been that way and I think that is why I only have one female friend that I consider a close friend. I also have no problem with this because I am happy with the seven people who are always there to speak to about practically anything. I've tried to include more people in this closer circle of friends, but it has only really worked out with a very small group. It makes for one hell of a group, though! The funny thing is that of these seven people, I only hangout with four of them on a regular basis. The four of you know who you are. As for the other three, there are certain circumstances that prohibit hanging out to some extent, but I can see the number of often hangouts increasing by at least one in a relatively short amount of time. I won't tell you why, though, life's no fun without mystery.

Chase and I should add this to our communication devices 

I'm always hanging out with the same people though. The nice thing is that I have that one core group that I hangout with often. This group is mainly comprised of the great friendships I developed before and during high school and with a couple people at college. What I found interesting is that the study says that I only hangout with 23 people with some regularity. That means that the other 320 people I barely ever hangout with. This brings up a funny point that I only recently have come to realize. One thing about me is I really enjoy running around like a lunatic. This is why I run track and like to play pickup games of ultimate Frisbee and soccer. All of these things involve running around and I love it! The realization that I came to is that I have a group of friends back home that I only see when we play Frisbee. There is nothing wrong with that, but it's just funny that I practically have no other interaction with these people unless we are playing Frisbee. And now that we are all getting older, people are becoming lazier and we don't play as much. So now we only play very sparingly and that is probably why I find myself very rarely hanging out with a more diverse crowd.

 For some reason I usually find myself getting along quite well with people that are older than me. For instance, in college I always hung out with people one grade above me. I use the past tense here, because I am still in college, but they are not. This year has been strange for me because all these people that I used to hangout with are just simply not here anymore. The hangout number is also very low because it is so hard to get people to do anything. I struggle all summer, or I used to because I don't really try anymore, to get people together to hangout. The excuses are just unbearable. I can understand if you can't hangout all the time, but some people have an excuse everyday. How is everyday someone in your family's birthday? You study every second that you're not in class? Why are you always busy? The busy excuse, so classic in every sense of the word, makes me laugh. Whether I'm trying to hangout with people or just talk to them, the busy excuse always gets me. Who isn't busy? I go to college, too, and I run track, but look at this, I still find time to do shit like blog! People who constantly tell me they're busy are the same people that I stop inviting to do things. It's not that I don't like these people, I just stop doing it because it's a waste of my time. There are people I know/used to know that I would absolutely enjoy hanging out with/talking to from time to time, but they have just pushed me away (intentionally or unintentionally, it doesn't really matter) to the point where I just don't bother anymore.

One thing that I am very happy to report after conducting this study is that there is no one on my friends list that I hate. I did not make one single tally in that section. In fact I reported that I like 155 of my "friends." I do realize that only comes out to 45.189504%, but I found myself answering "I don't know" for many people, either because I don't know them all that well or because I haven's seen them in such a long time that I really don't know. People can change, so for all I know someone could have become a complete jackass. Of course the opposite could have happened, too.

Basically what I found confirmed my beliefs. I've thought for quite some time now that I always see and hangout with the same people. I don't mind because I like the people I associate with, but it does show a transition in my life. As I get older, lots of bonds have broken, but the ones that remain have grown even stronger and I believe they will last. I don't bother to add people on Facebook anymore because I find it rather worthless and pointless. It's not like I communicate with anyone on there anyways. I haven't sent out a friend request in over a year now and I'm not Facebook friends with some people that I see and interact with on a daily basis. I know this might be confusing to some people, but yes I am friends with  people who are not my Facebook friends.

I think that if I had conducted this study sometime during freshman year of college, the results would have been very different. I used to stay in touch with many more of my friends back then, but they are not only to blame for the lack of communication lately. I'll be honest here, I make very little effort to communicate. I text about four of my friends with some regularity, AIM with two almost daily, and no longer use Facebook as a communication device. I no longer use Facebook as a communication tool because I don't like the lack of privacy. With each "update" (I would call it a downdate because it gets worse each time), Facebook becomes less private. I do realize that people could see what you had "written on someone's wall" before, but now there is a stream on the right side of the homepage that tells all your "friends" when you do anything. I look at and this is what it looks like:

So-and-so commented on so-and-so's picture
So-and-so commented on so-and-so's wall post on so-and-so's wall
So-and-so likes some stupid shit
So-and-so commented on so-and-so's wall post on so-and-so's wall
So-and-so likes some stupid shit
So-and-so likes so-and-so's pointless status
So-and-so commented on so-and-so's pointless status
So-and-so commented on so-and-so's pointless status
So-and-so added 2,394,902 pictures to the album "What happened last night?"
So-and-so liked so-and-so's picture
So-and-so posted on so-and-so's wall
So-and-so likes some stupid shit
So-and-so commented on so-and-so's post on so-and-so's wall
So-and-so commented on so-and-so's picture
So-and-so updated their status to song lyrics
So-and-so commented on so-and-so's picture
So-and so likes some stupid shit
So-and-so added 4,328 pictures to the album "Who put those handcuffs on?"
So-and-so commented on so-and-so's status (by adding the next line in the song)
So-and-so likes some stupid shit
So-and-so is now friends with so-and-so
So-and-so likes some stupid shit
So-and-so commented on so-and-so's wall post on so-and-so's wall
So-and-so commented on so-and-so's status (added another line to the song)
So-and-so is attending some stupid shit
So-and-so liked so-and-so's status
So-and-so commented on so-and-so's wall post on so-and-so's wall
So-and-so likes some stupid shit

If you don't get it, Facebook broadcasts everything to everyone. Not only do I not care about a single one of these events, but I would also not like my "friends" to be aware of everything I do. I also believe I state at the beginning of this post that I would not bash Facebook right now, but I think you can see where I'm coming from. I rarely ever write on anyone's wall anymore because Facebook broadcasts to everyone that you did so. If I really want to get in touch with someone I message them. I will also add that I don't do this with many people, so these people are in a special category and they know who they are.

With all this said, I would be more than happy to reconnect with any of my lost friends. I think I will at some point, too. I can' say why, but I have a feeling. The end of the semester is approaching, it's almost Thanksgiving and not long after that is winter break. I hope to see some old friends over this period of time, especially this year because I don't know what my life will be like a year from now. I might have a job, and if I do, where I will be located I know not. My friends might have jobs, too! There is a good possibility that I will not be on the same school schedule that I've grown accustomed to over the past sixteen years, I guess. As for the people I know I am going to see over the break, I think we will have some fun. Chase and I have some good ideas about possible mini-movies to make and put up on YouTube. I really hope these come to fruition, it might be a way to get Retentive Gibberish out of it's current recession.

Well, here are the complete results of the study, and you should conduct it yourself!


Last Time Spoke With

• Today                                                             21 (6.122%)
• Within a week                                                 15 (4.373%)
• Within a month                                                43 (12.536%)
• This year                                                         90 (26.239%)
• More than a year                                           169 (49.271%)
• Never                                                               3 (0.874%)

Hangout with

• Often                                                                4 (1.166%)
• Sometimes                                                      19 (5.539%)
• Rarely                                                             61 (17.784%)
• Never                                                           259 (75.510%)

Friends Label

• Close friends                                                    7 (2.041%)
• Teammate                                                      17 (4.956%)
• Family                                                            14 (4.081%)
• Coworker                                                      11 (3.206%)
• Don't know why we're "friends"                      72 (20.991%)
• Friend                                                            55 (16.034%)
• Acquaintance                                                167 (48.688%)

How I feel about you:

• I like you                                                       155 (45.189%)
• Neutral                                                            57 (16.618%)
• I don't like you                                                 12 (3.498%)
• I hate you                                                          0 (0.000%)
• Depends                                                          33 (9.621%)
• I don't know                                                    86 (25.072%)

I think it is only fitting to end this post with a quote from a literary legend, Bilbo Baggins:

"I don't know half of you as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve."

College Living: The Townhouse

Senior year in college has been much different simply because I no longer live in a typical dorm. I'm still on campus, but I live an area a bit removed from the rest of the school in a townhouse. I really like this style, no more meal plan, I cook for myself and I have a single. I live with four friends from school (there are five of us total in case you can't count/are confused) and it's quite hilarious given everyone's different lifestyles. Getting along with them isn't hard, but I find myself so different than them that it really is comical, especially from my perspective. One of my roommates is very messy, in the kitchen and just in general. It's annoying and funny how he just leaves his dishes and dirty utensils and cups in the sink. I will wash them or put them in the dishwasher, but only because I might need to use them. I think he's just used to not washing anything at home that he doesn't realize we, his roommates, are the ones who have to clean his shit. That's just the kitchen, though. Get a look at these pictures of the bathroom.

 Yes, all those towels are his. I think there are four in the picture, but I am rather certain that I have seen more. And yes, those are the tops of fast food cups on the counter top next to his male fitness magazines. I didn't get a picture of it, but his clothes were also scattered about the floor. I'll be able to get a good shot of that soon. The bathroom was recently cleaned by one of my other roommates, but the toilet is clogged now (again) and I'm sure that the clothing and towels will begin to build yet again. What I find amazing about this is how he can just leave his towels and clothing on the bathroom floor... for weeks. Guess he's not too worried about them getting dirty. I wonder if he uses the towels off the floor? He was also my roommate freshman year and I remember one of my towels going missing. I think I know where it ended up now, the floor. I'll have to get a picture of the sink sometime, but that won't be hard. I usually find myself fuming in the kitchen more than once each week, so I can bet on that happening again very, very soon. The more I think about it, the more I think that I'll probably be in that situation tomorrow. Regardless of when I actually post this, I will probably find myself in that situation tomorrow. In case you don't get it, the sink is full of dirty shit all the time.

I am quite happy to prepare my own meals, though. I have certainly taken a liking to cooking. My cooking expertise lacks depth right now, I only know how to prepare a few different dishes, but I think they sure are coming out well. Learning by doing and experimenting is how I've been operating. My roommate, the messy one I was talking about before, actually told me that he thinks I am by far the best cook in the townhouse. I'll take the compliment, but I'm also willing to actually prepare my meals. Often my roommates have frozen meals or meals that do not require much preparation at all. I don't think the meals I make are complicated, but they do take a little bit of time to prepare sometimes, but it is always worth it. Even when I haven't done it completely correct, the end result still tastes good so I could care less because the next time it will be even better!

Must be hard to screw this up

I'm a huge fan of stir fry, which also isn't very hard to prepare. I just like the idea of cooking a bunch of vegetable and some type of meat and dumping it on top of rice. Always tastes so good! Last year I ate stir fry practically everyday in the dining hall, but now I get to chose what kind I have and I don't need to hope that the lunch serves don't completely flood the whole thing with sauce. Sometimes they put so much sauce on the meal that it looked kind of like soup. Best of all, though, no more waiting in the tremendously long, slow line for stir fry. Along with cooking/preparing meals is getting the ingredients. I do grocery shopping now! I actually like grocery shopping because I'm in total control over what I want to buy. I have fun buying food with the knowledge that I'm going to cook it and eat it! And that it will be delicious of course. In my estimation, my cooking skills have grown significantly since I moved in to the townhouse in September. I also might have mentioned before that one of my friends from school is studying abroad this semester, but she told me that she wants me to cook her some meals when she gets back so it's a good thing I'm getting in some practice now!

While going through the random pictures I have from this year, I came across one from the first full weekend of school. That weekend there is an event that has become known as "Around the World." Basically townhouses prepare different shots and the rest of the school comes down to the townhouses to take a shot at each house. This isn't my thing at all, but it sure is hilarious to watch. What I found really funny was my townhouse's shot. My roommate, the messy one again (he's quite a character), and his friend from back home were talking up how awesome the shot they were going to have was going to be so great. They called it PMV, but I will not say what that stands for because it is somewhat vulgar. You might be able to guess yourself, so go ahead! Come the night of Around the World, all the people coming into our townhouse would take a shot of our stuff and continually say how they didn't like it. After all the hype and talk about how good the drink was, it turned out to be a huge bust. Who would have guessed?!

The picture above shows all the alcohol that my housemates gathered for the weekend. Quite a variety, but Busch light, come on, everyone knows that beer sucks.That weekend was certainly interesting. For some reason we have a bunch of sand outside the back door of our townhouse and during Around the World there was some precipitation. This led to one hell of a mess in our common area. There was mud and dirt all over the floor. I should have taken a picture of that, but we were all too concerned with getting the place cleaned first. I don't think the floor has fully recovered from that weekend yet. It's still somewhat dirty, but we barely use the common area for anything, which I find comical. We basically only go down there to use the kitchen to prepare meals. We barely ever eat down there, I eat most of my meals in my room. I attribute this to the fact that we rarely eat at the same times. I'd rather eat in my room than sit at our table in the common area and eat by my lonesome. We go down there to use the other bathroom, too, now that the upstairs toilet is clogged, again, one or two days after we just unclogged it.

One of the biggest things that has happened recently is quite random. I believe it happened two weekends ago. I remember getting up that Sunday morning, it was a normal Sunday morning, nothing unusual. I was just chilling in my room before the rest of my roommates got up (they sleep in much later than I do). Once they finally did wake up, I could hear them speaking about how they had a cat and that they were going to raise it. My messy roommate had an apartment with some friends during the summer and one of his friends living with him had a cat. Apparently the cat got pregnant and had four kittens I believe. My roommate decided to take one of the cats with him and raise it in our townhouse. The kitten is living with us now and has been name Wiz (Whiz, I don't know how to spell it). I believe he named him after the rapper, I don't know why though. I thought the name was very appropriate at first because the cat was peeing on them and their beds. He's grown up a lot since then. He knows to use the litter to do business and he's actually very people friendly.

He looks so cute, right? Well he is, but he can be a little bastard. He scratched one of my roommates on the face already, not too bad, but he still did it. His claws are just really sharp. Wiz also likes footwear and climbing things. The best part about the whole thing is what my roommate is trying to use the cat for. He constantly shows girls Wiz. He does this because he thinks it will help him get an in with them! Absolutely hysterical!

So that's what's going down in the townhouse. Well, there is some other stuff going on, but I don't want to discuss that right now (bet you can guess). That means it's random picture time!

Cheap Machete at Walmart, only $6.88!

Spectacular Parking Job!

Counterfeit Windows!